Wednesday, June 25, 2003

I didn't tell any of you!

On Monday night, LeMars had the biggest rainstorm in its history. Or at least my history. Or at least my history within the last three years.

The storm was so big that it knocked the lights out. Power? OUT! Electricity? OUT! My mind? COMPLETELY BLOWN!

My mom and I sat in the living room, chatting. She laid on the floor. I was sprawled out on the couch. We talked about stuff I can no longer remember. It was important and all. I just think the lightning which occasionally filled the room has erased my brain.

Like I said... my mind? COMPLETELY BLOWN!

Since there was no power, there was no TV. And since there was no TV, I decided to rot my brain and read a book. I finished the one I'd been reading intently for the last couple weeks. It was "You Shall Know Our Velocity" by Dave Eggers. Which was... TERRIFIC!

There's a lot of ideas running through the book, but the one that I'll share with you is this... so these guys go on a trip around the world in one week and decide to give out money to people they see, right? The interesting thing is... they keep building up what an experience it will be. And so whenever they're stalled or they overslept or whatever, they're kicking themselves for having wasted their time. What was supposed to be this monumental thing just becomes boring and inconsequential.

This has so much relevance in my life. All the time I'm trying to create "fun" and "important" moments, but everyone knows... you can't force stuff like that. It only comes naturally.

Lately, I've been having problems experiencing life purely. It's constantly bogged down with expectations and artificiality. When I go to rock shows, I don't get lost in the music. Not like I did when I was 16. I just stand there, thinking, "Yes. This rocks. Right? This rocks? Yes. This rocks."

I've never done drugs, but I've always been convinced that if I did, I wouldn't be able to enjoy them. I'd be too focused on if they were working on me or not. I'd over-think to the point that I would just be dissatisfied and bored.

So there goes using drugs as a way of escaping.

This was a joke. Do not write your local congressman.

I watched "Aliens" tonight. At one point, Ripley tapes two guns together. Jake and I both spoke in unison, "That's pretty cool."

We are boys. Boys are we.

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