This semester, I'm in a Jogging class.

Every Tuesday and Thursday morning, for 30 minutes, I run around a track in the Fieldhouse. The track's pretty short, so I end up going around 30 times or so.

As for my fellow classmates, the class is mostly filled with girls, but there's 3 other guys with me. This male/female disproportion usually seems to be the case in the other Phys. Ed. courses I've taken at the University of I-o-waaah - those being "Fitness Walking" and "Rhythm Ballroom Dancing" (a.k.a. "The Worst Class In the History of the Universe's Galaxy")

Strange thing happened in class this morning. Everybody's running around the track, right? And I feel myself noting how the other males are doing. And I realize I'm running much faster than them. And how I don't stop to walk like they do. I was, in essence, "beating" them.

So I start running harder. And faster. And I start lapping them. In fact, I got so zealous about it that when one guy started to catch up with me... I ran harder, so he wouldn't pass me.

Sure, this sounds like your basic run-of-the-mill competition. And I'm sure that was at play, but I think it could be more aptly described as a "nerd revenge fantasy." All these guys were bulky and muscular and I'm sure I took some pride in showing them up - like I was proving I could be the more athletic male.

But what the hell, Paul? This was a class. And people were running for health/recreation. It wasn't the 100 Meter Dash at the Hershey Track Meet. Why was I getting so much satisfaction from such an unimportant event? I doubt those other guys even noted the situation.

I don't know. Maybe it's my pathetic way of making up for the previous class...

On Tuesday, in Jogging, we had a fitness exam. Overall, I did well. But then came the "strength test." We had to squeeze this grip-thing with our hand and a dial measured how strong we were. My results? My score was smack-dab in "poor." In fact, I compared it with the girls' chart and my score was just 1 above what's considered "poor" for girls.

Yeah, I gots no strength. But I can run around a track 30 times - without anyone giving a damn.