After nearly four weeks in Los Angeles, California, I finally secured a job yesterday. I'm logging footage for the new reality-series version of Gilligan's Island.

What's "logging" you ask? Well, I watch numerous videotapes (containing hours and hours of footage shot for the show) and write in a computer what happened in those tapes. That way, other folks can read the logs and figure out how to create a narrative using this information. So far, it's a pretty cool job. I would tell you more, but I signed a confidentiality agreement.

Instead of making a dumb "I'd have to kill you" joke right now, I'll just share a humorous story with you: Last week, I woke up in the middle of the night to go pee and it wasn't until 15 seconds of urination that I realized I was pissing on my closed toilet seat.

I'd tell you more... but then I'd have to kill you.