Friday, May 06, 2005

Sure has been a long time since my last post, hasn't it? I know, I know. Sometimes grandma forgets.

So guess where I was for the past couple days? That's right. Las Vegas! How'd you know? Gosh, you must be either: a) a very good guesser or B) a ghost who follows me around. If you happen to be "B" and are reading this, by all means, please wear a little derby, so you can look cute like this little fella.

For all you non-Boo-Berries out there, here's a rundown of what Bmax, DJ, and I did in Las Vegas:

- We stayed at the hotel/casino Imperial Palace. Whereas dumps like the Bellagio offer a breath-taking butterfly conservatory and junkyards like Caesar's Palace provide a gorgeous Greek pool, the magnificent Imperial Palace has... yes, "Dealertainers."

It's fantastic! Instead of regular, boring casino dealers, Imperial Palace has CELEBRITY IMPERSONATORS work the tables. Get it? "Dealers + Entertainers = still doesn't make sense." Here's a picture gallery that you're dying to see.

And trust me, you haven't lived until you've seen Jake Blues (of the Blues Brothers) finish a dance routine, then look at his watch, breathe a sigh of disappointment, and walk off into the men's bathroom. Remember the slogan: what happens in Vegas... stays with you forever and crushes your soul.

-We went to "We Will Rock You," the futuristic musical-comedy based on the music of rock sensations, Queen. It was... incredible! Tell me: would you like me less (or MORE?!) if you knew that I wept during the "Somebody to Love" segment? If you'd like me more, then yes... I cried like a baby. If you'd like me less, then... melt that block of ice you call a heart.

- We rode a thrill ride known as "The X-scream". Here's the Stratosphere Hotel's description: "At 866 feet, X Scream is the world's third highest thrill ride. Shaped like a giant teeter-totter, X Scream is an open vehicle that propels riders head-first, 27 feet over the edge of the Stratosphere Tower and dangles them weightlessly above the Strip before pulling it's riders back and over again for more!"

Here's my decription: "Ehhh. I want out. Stop this. Why did I agree to do this? I want off. Stop this. Stop the ride. Please! I want off!" Mind you, I never uttered these words, but... they were screaming in my mind during the entire ride. Actually, these very same words are my daily morning affirmation as well.

Now I'm back in Los Angeles: the greatest thrill ride of them all!

...after "Autopia" in Disneyland.

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